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Thelonious Octopus & KC - Blitzen Trapper

from KCollab​.​30 by Ken Clinger and Friends

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lyrics

Blitzen Trapper (Thelonious Octopus & KC)
(lyrics © Thelonious Octopus)

Christmas Eve! Shout Hip hip hooray!
Santa Claus is coming today!
I don’t care what all my friends say!
He’s real, believe all the way!
But I will show them they are wrong
By the end of this silly song!
I’ll set a trap for his reindeer
And get the best prize of all year!

I am going to trap Blitzen
Mom and Dad said it’s quite brazen
But I want to be a trapper
Of that doe who is so dapper
Then they will all have to believe
On this wonderful Christmas Eve
That Santa is for real
“Hip hip hooray!” we will squeal!

Outside snow is falling
I know Santa will be calling.
I went to the roof in a dash
And set up a trap in a flash
With just a sprig of mistletoe
I know I will catch that dear doe
For it’s her favorite Christmas treat
It will hold up the whole deer fleet!

I am going to trap Blitzen
Mom and Dad said it’s quite brazen
But I want to be a trapper
Of that doe who is so dapper
Then they will all have to believe
On this wonderful Christmas Eve
That Santa is for real
“Hip hip hooray!” we will squeal!

With a big laugh heard far and wide
Santa’s sleigh came down with a glide.
Resting firmly on my own roof
With the clomp clomp clomp of the hooves
Blitzen ate up her Christmas treat
And I rose up fast from my seat.
I have her now, oh Christmas joy!
I’m happy as a baby boy!

I trapped Blitzen, I trapped her sure!
Proof of Santa I did procure!
I am the true Blitzen trapper
Of that doe who is so dapper!
Now they will all have to believe
On this wonderful Christmas Eve
That Santa is for real
“Hip hip hooray!” we will squeal!

Santa boomed, “Hold still, little boy!
If you take her there’ll be no joy
For nobody will get their toys
With this plot that you have deployed!
It takes all nine to drive my sleigh
Without one I am forced to stay!
Think of all on this Christmas Day
So all can shout hip hip hooray!”

I trapped Blitzen, but off she goes!
They’re all led by Rudolph’s red nose!
I was the true Blitzen trapper
Of that doe who is so dapper!
Maybe not all my friends believe
On this wonderful Christmas Eve
That Santa is for real
But “Hip Hip hooray” I will squeal!

credits

from KCollab​.​30, released March 30, 2013
Jeff Stoneking: lyrics,
Ken Clinger: music & performance

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Ken Clinger Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

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